Enjoy the Small Things

You know, it's weird. No matter how much we have, we always seem to want more. You ever hear of Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs? It's some complicated triangle thing. Well, I guess it's not too complicated, I mean, it's just a triangle right? Anyway, so on the bottom are all the things we need for basic life. Stuff like, food, water, shelter, and Frogger.

Maslow's Triangle of Stuff

Some people are stuck on the bottom of the triangle; every day they are just trying to get food and find a place to sleep. Maybe they are also taking care of kids. They don't have the time to think about stuff higher up in the triangle. Stuff like friendship, self-esteem, and candy bars. I mean, when you are just struggling to survive every day, you don't have time to worry about the meaning of your life, or what kind of candy bar you will get. Every day is a fight to stay alive. But if you do have those things, and have a job and a place to live, then you want more, higher up in the triangle. Then you want friends and stuff. Even love.

The point is, no matter where you are in the triangle, there's usually stuff above you that you still want. And when that happens, you spend a lot of time thinking about it. But then you don't think about what you already have. You and me, we aren't like those people I mentioned. We have food and a place to live. We might think our life sucks, but think how it must suck to be them! Some of these people don't even have their own place to poop!

Yeah, think about that for a second. Or at least, the next time you go to the bathroom. You can even appreciate having a toilet. Now, I know that you and I probably do appreciate small things sometimes, I think we are that kind of people. We can have fun without lots of money, or things. We are creative types. But even then, sometimes we get stuck thinking about what we want and what we don't have. Well, next time that happens, just find something small that makes you happy. Every day, look around, find one little thing that makes you happy. For me, it's my friends, Speed Racer, having a soda (or a donut!), the trees and sky, the stars, music, how much I love music! Remember the things that you like and really enjoy them. Who cares what you don't have? You can run and sing and laugh and do lots of things. Enjoy every single day, because in all those small things, you have riches beyond compare.

Cut people off

Sometimes in life, there are things that don't bring anything good to you. They are just there, taking up space, or worse; causing problems. These are the type of things you should get rid of. Sometimes, people are like this too.

Now look, I don't want you to suddenly become all cold and calculating and some kind of loner (though it looks cool in movies, it's not that much fun.) I'm just saying that sometimes, it is definitely the right thing to do to stop talking to someone, and even avoid their presence altogether.

Here's an example. I had a friend I met about ten years ago. She was really cool, and we had a lot of fun. But she had this crazy temper. She would just lose it sometimes and start cussing me out over the most ridiculous things. One time she even was screaming at me at a table in a restaurant while we were out with friends. So, every time this would happen, we'd both be mad for a while then she'd apologize and be all sorry and want to be friends again. So, I let it go.

Eventually, this became a regular thing. I got to the point where I would stop talking to her for a while, but then weeks later she'd show back up and want to be friends again. She'd be all nice and stuff, and I'd think, okay, fine. Then she would do it again. It was really stressful and uncomfortable and eventually I realized, even though she was cool, the bad stuff was not worth it. So I told her that was it, and now she still tries to come back (years later!) and I have to remind myself how bad she can get. I am happier and, most importantly, less stressed out without her.

This can happen with relationships too, I mean, the dating kind. A girl I know dating this guy, who was wonderful, and sweet, and did all these things she liked; but if he did not get his way about something, he would totally freak out and call her names and make her feel guilty and basically be horrible to her. I said, look, that is unacceptable behavior! And she would say, "Yes but besides that he is so nice and everything I want..." Well, that's just like saying, "Man, this food is so tasty and great, I love to eat it! I don't mind that there is poison in it!"

Some people are just poisonous. Sure, the poison might taste sweet, but you still will get sick. So, I know what you are thinking: "This entry is already too long Uncle Steve, I'm being distracted by various shiny objects." But I want to tell you one more thing: you have to be tough when you cut people off. Once you have realized they need to go, you shouldn't let them beg their way back in. Be tough. Say no. Make a clean ending.